he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
