do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
