If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
