i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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