I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
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