I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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