Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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