I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize