a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Randomize
