I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.