Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
