it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Randomize
