Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
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