Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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