I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Randomize
