I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
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