Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
stop calling my apartment porn island.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Randomize
