Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
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