I'm jealous of your bromance
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
