she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
These tits shall not be calmed
Randomize