and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
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