I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
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