Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
