Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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