i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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