the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
