Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
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