she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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