Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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