Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Randomize
