i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Randomize