dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
