at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Randomize
