hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
