I'm really into asian looking animals
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
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