He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
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