brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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