Buhtt sex?
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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