So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Randomize