TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Randomize
