what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
