I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
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I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
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The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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