I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Randomize
