she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
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