Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Randomize
