we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
