But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Randomize
