I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
