Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
Randomize
