I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
